Archive for February, 2010

Finding a partner is a serious goal and who you choose is very important. However if you appear to be too serious about it or intense, it is amazing how quickly you will put off possible suitors.  Although it is your goal to find a partner, it is important to be the type of partner your partner is seeking.

Even though your partner is seeking a woman to marry and create a family with, men never want to be rushed into marriage. They must fall in love first.  Unless you allow him to fall in love, he will not be at all interested in marriage or children.

For a man to fall in love with a woman he must yearn for her. Don’t mix up lust with love.  He may be attracted to you. He may have already, with subtlety, indicated that he finds you attractive.

He may even have given the impression that he would like to have sex with you, however that does not mean that he wants to spend the rest of his life with you. Men can be attracted to any number of women and to have a sexual encounter with him does not mean he will want to marry you.  After sex he is more than likely, even less likely to want to marry you.

Most men dream of marrying a virgin in a white wedding dress. However don’t let that worry you – just don’t be too easy.  If you want to marry him allow him to fall in love with you. Give him the opportunity to yearn. Allow him to yearn for you.

No. 1 priority is to be the person he wants to be with.  Live in the now.  Enjoy the moment, rather than planning ahead. He wants a woman who is fun, a companion, a playmate and a best friend. He does not want to be smothered or controlled.

He does not want to be mothered or fussed over; he wants to show you how manly he is. How he can organise things. How he can call you and invite you out all of his own accord. It may not be at the speed you like but if you are interested in him you will let him be and let him do his own courting at his own pace.

We have heard of women who treated the first meeting like a job interview.  We hear of couples who have just met who start off by asking each other what are they looking for in a relationship. That couple never hits it off because what they are doing to each other is too confronting.  Too scary and it also scares women off as well as men.

I have noticed at Entre Nous introduction agency that impatient women do better with a few guys on the go at the same time.  Even if you are not interested in some of the men you meet, develop friendships so that you are keeping busy and having fun whilst you are waiting for ‘the one’ to get his act together.

You cannot hurry him and if you do you are taking the risk of putting him off altogether or even worse; that you end up sliding in to the relationship without a firm commitment from him.

I have heard this story many times from men who come to Entre Nous after a divorce: “I never really fell in love with her. We got on well, the sex was great, and before I knew it we were living together. She fell pregnant and wanted to marry. I didn’t have the heart to say ‘no’.  However I never really fell in love with her.  She ended the marriage because she said we had grown apart. This time I want to fall in love with a woman and I want to do my own chasing.”

How would you like this to happen to you? How would you like to end up with a man who wasn’t in love with you – just liked the sex?  This is much worse than putting a man off because you are too pushy or talked about marriage or a permanent relationship too soon.

If you really want a man, live in the ‘now’, be enjoyable company and have fun. The heavy stuff will come but you cannot force it and get away with it. If you control the situation what you are doing is manipulating.  It doesn’t work in the long term. You may think you have achieved something but it will be at a great cost.

If you are really keen, throw away his telephone number, let him do the phoning and make sure you are going out, (not dating) with others. Keep your calendar busy so that you will not be tempted to call him.

It is most important that a man be more in love with a woman than she is with him. Especially if she is to have children with him because she is more vulnerable than he is. If he is deeply in love with you and you are 8 ½ months pregnant and have a tantrum and throw a pot of paint over him he will still love you if he is deeply in love with you.  However you must allow him to fall in love with you at his own pace.

When you meet a lovely man, be what he wants at first – a fun playmate. Men want the same things as women but in a different order. Change your order to suit him.  Have fun and enjoy the moment and the rest will follow. Once a man falls deeply in love he will move at a great pace but you have to allow him to fall in love.

Rosalind Baker is the Principal and Founder of Entre Nous Introduction Agency www.entrenous.com.au and author of 3 best sellers, Dial A Woman, Dial A Man and Dial A Personality To find out: Your Personality Type, or to find out”Are You Eligible” or “Are you ready for a relationship?” visit: www.singles.net.au

 Mail this post

Technorati Tags: , ,

Leave your Comment

divorce for men only…

men divorce
Image taken on 2009-11-06 09:55:25 by mandiberg.

 Mail this post

Technorati Tags: ,

Leave your Comment

Is your relationship a little rocky? Better yet are you already divorced or is your husband threatening to take the kids, the house, the dog and even the shirt off of your back. If this is you I can definitely feel your pain.

If you want to know how to win back my husband I am sure you have experienced this before. Check it out. You probably work long gruesome hours at work to provide for your family right? But your husband just doesn’t understand that, he feels that you are not there enough for him.

But guess what you feel the same as him. You feel like he doesn’t have the time to meet your personal needs. When the kids are good and sleep and you want to get intimate what does he say? “I’ve had a long day and I really don’t feel like it today, maybe tomorrow” but tomorrow never comes. Can you marriage be saved? Should it be? Here’s how you can win back husband.

To win your back husband, the first thing you must determine is whether or not the relationship is worth it. It is easier to get your husband back if you are still married. If you are already divorced it will take a lot more effort. Either way it takes two to make a marriage and if you want to win him back it’s going to take time and hard work. The both of you have you have to want to make things work. It’s not a one-way decision, if your husband has checked out and is determined he doesn’t want you back, there is very little you can do.

Regardless of your story, many people stay in a marriage or relationship because of children. However that’s not enough. How to win back my husband begins with some sort of commitment by the both of you that the relationship is worth rekindling.

After that you need to look over things with a fine comb and target the problem or problems if you want to win back husband. Many people believe that one of the biggest
Next, you must pinpoint the problem or problems in a relationship. One of the biggest misconceptions people have when trying to save a relationship is that they believe the symptoms of the problem are the problem itself.

You with me? No. Well check this out. A lot of people believe that cheating or having an affair is the problem that caused the break up. However the real truth of the matter is that the affair is the symptom, which is a result of a much deeper issue. Maybe his or her love life died and someone decided to look elsewhere to fill the void. Many people think the affair itself is the problem. But the truth is the underlying issues were the problem. In this case it was a lack of intimacy.

When you start to deal with core issues rather than symptoms, you can win back husband.

The next step to get your husband back after you have pinpointed the true problems in the relationship is to let your husband or ex husband know how you feel about the problems. Don’t just lecture him about how you are feeling. It is crucial that you also listen to his concerns and feelings. Hold your husband by the hand and look him in the eyes when you share your feelings about the problems in the relationship. This will send him a non-verbal cue that you want to rekindle things. When your husband expresses the things that hurt or piss you off, just keep in mind that he is not doing it because he wants to intentionally hurt your feelings. Instead it is because they want to relationship progress and grow also.

The next thing you want to do to win your husband back is to create a simple plan to solve the problems you may be having. Take some time out of your schedule to go on a date maybe once a week, two weeks, or once a month. If communication is the culprit then try to have a conversation over dinner or spend time talking before you go to bed. Just take action.

The help you need is the “Magic of Making Up”, an excellent e-book by T. Dub Jackson. In the in The magic of making you will find some very simple ways and methods that will show you how to get your husband back. They are plain suggestions and real down to earth methods although some what unconventional to help you to get your husband back in days – not months or years. The get husband back formula is for women having an intense urge to find out ways and means to make up for their loss. They are no way black magic but works like magic to get your husband back.

That’s why it is called The magic of making up, an e-book that can make you relish the true sense of love fully renewed and rejuvenated. This magic of making up lays down all the necessary ingredients and simple yet unconventional procedures needed to get your husband back.

 Mail this post

Technorati Tags: , , ,

Leave your Comment

 Mail this post

Technorati Tags: ,

Comments (25)

Hello to All My Readers!!

Today I will be writing about an evil old lady based on true stories also presently happening as you read.. Her name is Gwan Yuk Lan. No, I do not know the meaning of her name. Mrs. Lan is 80 years old and very healthy. She has all her teeth, she can run fast, jog, perfect vision, great hearing and memory. Mrs. Lan has 5 daughters and 2 sons. 4 daughters in Ottawa, 2 sons in Ottawa and 1 daughter that chose to stay in China. Mrs. Lan is my grandma, my evil grandma. I am the youngest child in my family of 5 one older sister at 24 and one older brother at 25r. Mrs. Lan has lived with our family of 5 since all three of us were born!

1. Mrs.Lan use to be the one to bring us to the bus stop for school and pick us up from the bus stop from school just like every other granny’s would do. She was normal until we all hit our teenage years. So, who was the one who first noticed about Mrs. Lan’s evilness? Yes, indeed it was me! How? Let me tell you.. When I was about 14 years young I started catching Mrs. Lan doing all these annoying daily, evening routines that were absolutely pointless. I would also catch her do nasty things that would harm another human being. Not any other human being but blood family members including myself.

2. One day my family was out shopping and I decided to stay home while my grandma was downstairs. I got hungry and started to crave for milk so I went downstairs. As I was walking towards the kitchen Mrs. Lan did not hear me walk in and you would never believe what I seen. You know when you boil water you will pour it into those jugs to keep the water to stay hot? Well those.. So she got the water thing out and poured herself a glass of hot burning water. Right when she drank it near the end she poured back the rest of her leftovers back into the “thing”. That is very nasty. WHY? because we all drink from that, its like her telling us silently without anyone knowing to drink her saliva! Ewww.. like is she serious? On top of that how do we know how long she’s done that for. So now we gave her, her own personal water thing.

3. Many years back Mrs. Lan went to China to visit her oldest daughter. Thats when we realized that not only she was evil but her 5 daughters are worse. You would never believe what Mrs. Lan told her oldest daughter to do. So.. one day the family was eating dinner at home and next thing you know there was a phone call for my mother. Who was the other person on the other line? Yes, Mrs Lans oldest daughter. We never even met this lady that we call our aunt. anyways back to the point. So my mother is on the phone now asking who are you about 10 times. And the lady goes “your husband does’nt like you, he’s with “so and so”. You guys will divorce soon my brother told me so. My mom obviously don’t believe bullshit that she doesn’t see with her own eyes. So she told her I don’t believe what you say, I know who you are and don’t call back and hung up. Its obvious that Mrs. Lan has told her to do that or else how would she get our house number? I means its not in the phone book! I don’t know what it is with my grandma, or what she has against our family but whatever it is.. is not right at all..

Lest’s get straight to the point.. Why do I dislike her? what has she ever done to me?

Alot! not only what she does to me, shes the one who causes all the commotion in this house my parents put over her head. Shes the one whos trying to get my parents to have a divorce. Shes the one who makes my loving mother a life of a living hell. Nobody hurts my mother!! So let me tell you about the annoying things she does to me. I never use to have allergies until one day I thought allergies grown in me haha. One morning out of no-where I started to have very teary eyes, and I would keep on sneezing until I got my bum out of the bed to blow my nose because if I didn’t I would just keep sneezing with druling boogers down my nostril. I found out that it wasn’t allergies infact it was my grandmothers shedded skin I’ve been breathing in every night for the past 2 years. It became severe! How do I know its her shedded skin? Me and my grandma Mrs. Lan share rooms together and one day I snook into my room to see what she does. Mrs. Lan is a very sneaky person and you never know what she does so don’t blame me for being a curious young lady haha. Okay, So before I go on… You now how they say the older you are the more dry your skin is, so the more dry your skin is.. the more you get itchy.. so the more your itchy the more you shed? Well its true and whats worse is Mrs. Lan does not use lotion eaither. Mrs. Lan coming straight out of China she probably still don’t even know what lostion is and its 2009! anyways… So I sneak up the stairs and looked into my room and I catch her taking off her sweater, her shirt, her pants.. and basically each piece of clothing that she takes of she would shake the clothes over my bed where my pillow area is. Then she would take her pajama pants and wipe down her bed then take the pants and shake the pants over my bed again. Right now I got real mad but some how I needed evidence. So what did I do? I took my cellphone out and put it on record and got the evidence to show my parents. For the past 2 years I’ve been sniffing up all her dead skin cells including the extra dust tat was put onto my bed. That is just dusgusting!! 2 months ago I told my father that I will buy a lock to my room and lock my room up everytime I am out if she does that one more time. And of course.. 1st strike…2nd strike.. 3rd strike.. No.. I didn’t end up buying no lock because A. I didn’t know how to screw one on and B. My dad would object me from doing so. So what did I do.. I made my own.. I made my own by taking the entire door-nob OFF and now I am using the door-nob as a key to open the door! It’s not my fault! We gave her many warnings to stop but she wouldnt’ so she asked for that herself. Its not like we want to you know? Yes we feel sorry for her but really in truly I do not want to have that feeling of the so called allergies I had for 2 years. I know its her. and I know it was that because right after I made my own lock thing. I never even had a runny nose every again. IM happy! We are a chinese family, my parents and all the old generations believe in spirits, Buddha etc. So in my living room there is a stand with Mrs. Lans husbands picture on the stand because he’s passed away many years ago. And its there so she can pray to him. Its very hard to explain but you can ask the chinese about that and maybe they can define it better than I can. So anyways A couple days ago Jan/31/08. She was caught talking to the picture of her husband telling him to help her and to listen to her. And this is what she had said in Cantonese “You listen to me now, Their mother do not respect me at all.. Help me get them. I hope you get them. I hope they get hit by a car when they walk out of this house and die. I hope they get hit by a car and die!” ARE YOU SERIOUS? Does she not notice the things that she does is totally wrong? we tell her what mistakes she does what did we do wrong. Ya we know shes old but that doesnt mean we can let he do all those stupid nasty things right? Everything in her mind is normal how hard is it to just stop? Why only to this house? When she sleeps over its like different grandmother overcomes her body. To her other family she would show care.. she would call them by their names.. she would bring their shoes to them.. jackets.. whatever! To us? She never even said our names once.. does nothing but try to kill us.. I don’t get it!! Soo many other things on the list I want to write about but unfortunately there are too many.. I will stop now and keep looking out for more serious issues. Too Be Continued!

 Mail this post

Technorati Tags: , , , , , , ,

Leave your Comment

Short wedding, long marriage RINGGOLD, Ga. — Teresa James got a divorce after 16 years of marriage, but that personal experience prompts her to encourage couples to stay together for life. Read more on Chattanooga Times Free Press

 Mail this post

Technorati Tags: , , ,

Leave your Comment

5 Things to Do Before You Even Think about Divorce

Summary — There are a number of things you should do before you take any action on your divorce. These 5 things are critical if you blow it on one of these you may have really made a huge mistake.

There are many steps to take to protect yourself in a divorce. This article will get you started. Your best bet is to talk to a lawyer before you do anything.

1. Talk to a Marriage Counselor or other professional who may be able to help you save your marriage.

Even if you don’t think there’s hope for the marriage, “divorce counseling” can help you discover what went wrong, how to cope, and how to pick up the pieces and go on. Don’t wait for your spouse to participate. If you don’t know how to find a qualified counselor, our firm will be glad to recommend one or you can check out the directory of professionals at stayhappilymarried.com. Your employment, social or religious contacts might also provide leads.

2. Talk to an attorney before you do anything.

Even if you don’t end up hiring an attorney to handle your separation or divorce, you would be well advised to get as much information as you can before you even discuss divorce with your spouse. There’s a lot to know about divorce in North Carolina . . . our laws are complex and even the simplest situation can be very confusing to families already in distress. Actions you take now may very well affect the outcome of your divorce (see #3) and you need to understand your options ahead of time . . . not some time down the road when it may be too late to alter the outcome. Click here to find attorneys who are well versed in the intricacies of North Carolina divorce law.

3. Do not move out of the marital home without talking to an attorney first.

Leaving the house without a good reason may cause you to pay alimony or may result in your inability to collect alimony. If you leave the house, you may also be unable to return until after a court divides the property. This process might take more than a year. The best advice is to stay in the house until after you talk with an attorney unless your spouse is violent. If your spouse is violent, you must take all steps necessary to protect yourself and your children.

4. If you have been involved in any extramarital affairs, talk to a lawyer before you discuss this with your spouse or anyone else.

In this case, honesty may not be the best policy. In addition to the fact that adultery is illegal in some states, admission of an affair can have other dire consequences. If your spouse is a candidate for alimony, any illicit sexual behavior on your part (during the marriage . . . which includes the time you are separated) could end up costing you thousands in additional alimony payments.

5. Take concrete steps to safeguard your assets before you and your spouse begin discussing divorce.

One of these steps is to take possession of certain assets during separation, especially those assets you wish to be using, such as furniture and vehicles, and those assets that might be liquidated by your spouse, including precious gems and stones, other collectibles, cash, and bearer bonds.

Another self-protective step is to file what is known as a Lis Pendens in the Deeds Office of any county where you and/or your spouse own real property. The lis pendens puts third parties on notice of your claim to have an interest in the real estate against which the lis pendens is docketed. The lis pendens is basically a notice of pending litigation that may affect real property. A properly recorded and served lis pendens clouds the title to the property, preventing an effective sale of the property behind your back. The rules regarding a lis pendens contain very specific requirements, all of which are spelled out in section 1-116 and the following sections of the North Carolina General Statutes.

A third possible step to protect the assets of your marriage is to get an injunction restraining your spouse from transferring or otherwise disposing of any property covered by the restraining order. Your attorney can also use an injunction to get your separate property returned to you, where your separate property is in the possession of your spouse and the spouse refuses to give it to you. The equitable distribution statute also provides a means for you to obtain an interim distribution of marital property, pending a final resolution of the property matter. Such an interim allocation could, for instance, give you much needed funds on which to live.

Other protective measures you might consider in your divorce planning include: (1) protecting your own credit rating by freezing or closing joint cards and by blocking your spouse’s access to other joint credit such as a home equity loan; (2) closing joint bank accounts and opening accounts in your own, individual name; (3) changing the name of the responsible party on utility and other bills; and (4) spending where possible your spouse’s separate property first, marital property next, and your own separate property last.

While this list will help you get started on the right track, it is by no means a complete list of all the things you need to do and know if you are considering a divorce. For more information about the rights and duties of separating and divorcing husbands and wives visit one of our Raleigh divorce lawyers. You’ll find a complete law library, downloadable divorce forms, a legal fee calculator, a child support calculator, lists of professionals who can help you and stories from people just like you who have survived divorce.

 Mail this post

Technorati Tags: , , , , , ,

Leave your Comment

Marriage.

Dalip Singh Wasan, Advocate.

I had been studying in a girls high school and therefore, till I passed matriculation examination, I could never calculate whether I was beautiful or an ugly woman. When I joined government college in my town, I found that it was a co-educational institution. I noticed that the boys who were my class mates were not taking any interest in me and at the same time, I had been told by so many other class mates that the boys are after them and some of those girls also told me that the boy students were teasing them. And I noticed that they were very happy when they were telling me such instances and they were happy that they could get admission in this co-educational institution. I was not having all these happenings with me and therefore, I too started having desire in my heart of heart that I too should have a boy friend and I should be able to love him from the core of my heart and one day I should be able to have marriage with him. I had started preparing myself well in the morning and I had started utilizing some perfumes too, but in spite of my efforts none was coming forward and in fact I had started cursing my luck. All these lovemaking was not recognized in my society nor my parents were desiring from me that I should have a boy friend, but still this hunger had taken birth in me and I too started desiring that I should have a boy friend who could sit with me, have talks with me, should help me in my study, we should be together in the canteen, in the library, in the garden attached to our college and we should be coming together to the college and we should be returning together and since I was having a bicycle with me, I wanted that I should be waiting for him in the morning and he should becoming to my house giving bells from far and I should be sitting on the front side of his cycle.

I was not tolerating the talks of my friends, because none was being attracted towards me. I was a woman and I too wanted a man around me. All my friends had chosen their boy friends and they were found in the canteen, in the garden, in the library and at other places along-with their boy friends. I was the only unlucky girl who could not find a boy friend. I had calculated that I was not having the same beauty which the boys of those days wanted. This was not my mistake. I had started cursing my luck because God had written such a luck for me and because of these happenings in my college days, I had started believing that I shall remain unmarried and none of the boys shall be agreeing to have marriage contract with me. I had seen that all the three sisters of mine could get matches only after thorough checking and I had seen with my own eyes that the would be husbands wanted a separate meeting with my sisters and only then they had agreed for the marriage. And I had a fear in my mind that when I shall be completing my study, I shall be facing difficulty in having a suitable match for me and now I had left the hope of having marriage at all.

I had started taking interest in my study. I passed my graduation with flying colours for my college and for my family. I did my post-graduation and that too with first class first in the town. Then on the advice and right counseling of my senior teacher Babeeta, I completed my M.Phil. and then I joined research work and completed my Ph.D. in the subject of psychology. Punjabi University was starting this subject and they appointed me as a lecturer in this subject.

All my sisters had been married. My two younger brothers also married. My parents had been giving advertisements in news papers and some people had been coming to my house too. I had seen that none of the boys was actually willing to have marriage with me because I was not a girl of their expectations. Therefore, before they could give a negative reply to my parents, I told the parties that because of certain difficulties with me, I am not in a position to have marriage at this stage and therefore, they should not wait and should try to find out a suitable girls for their sons.

My parents were not happy with my attitude. They were interested in my marriage, because they were in old age and therefore, they were desiring that their daughter should have her own house. They were having all information with them that I was not so beautiful and therefore, now they had started calling some men who had a divorce or they were widowers. I had noticed that two and three people came and showed their willingness that they were ready to marry me. I could notice that they were actually not liking me, but they were trying to fill the blank in their life.

I had left the idea of marriage. I had already crossed 35 years of my age. My old friends had been meeting me and they were giving me information about their married life. Some of them were having happy married life. But some of them were telling me that their husbands were not good people. They were drug addicts, they were having relations with other women, they were not having sufficient income, they are dependant on their parents and some were not interested in their married life. When I head such news from others, I was happy that I could not be one of them. I had started living at my own feet. I had a job. I was having sufficient income. My job was such that I shall be having pension on my retirement. Therefore, I started having my own house on the other side of the University and actually I got one and the remaining amounts were paid by the University as house building lone. They had started recovering some amount as installment from my pay. My parents were not liking that I should live separately, but I shifted to the new house and assured my parents, that they shall be at liberty to stay with me when their sons started feeling that they are burden upon their shoulders. And in fact my parents had been living with me for moths together till they are called by my brothers and such events happened only when the people had started passing adverse remarks on my brothers. Otherwise, they were happy that their parents were living with me and they were telling me that they had left their parents with me only to give me protection. I knew what was in their mind, but still I had been keeping my parents with me because they were not any burden upon me. They had converted this house of mine as a home and when they were not with me it turned into a house of bricks and mortar. My parents had seen that none was coming to my house except some students who wanted extra instructions from my side.

I had been contributing some articles to news papers, to magazines and because of my hard labour I had produced some research books in the subject of psychology too. Some books were recognized by the universities and some of my articles got publication in international papers. Scholars in the subject had started appreciating my work and therefore, I had been having references in speech, in works and even some scholars had started quoting me as final authority on some intricate problems of human mind. I had started reading those letters and some of those letters were given due acknowledgment from my side. The writers were giving due regard while writing to me and I had the feeling that the people are liking me only because that they are liking my research work and when they shall see me personally, they would not write me nor they would be appreciating me. And under this fear I had completed 40 years of my life.

I had already left the idea of my marriage because up till now none had approached me and proposed marriage. I had been having so many colleagues who were having all respect, all regard and even love for me because of my work and hard labour which I had been putting in research work in my subject. I had been in correspondence with a person from London and he had been praising my work and findings on the subject of sex and its place in relations between man and woman and he had been giving me encouragement that I had given some new versions to this subject. I was surprised to note that I had been appreciated on my work in a subject which had been foreign to me because I could not had a marriage nor I could have a boy friend or a another man with whom I had sex. The man in correspondence disclosed in a letter that he too belonged to the state of Punjab in India and now has settled in London as a permanent resident. He had been telling me through his letters that he had crossed 45 years of his age, but is still unmarried because he had got no attraction towards the opposite sex. H had informed me that he had been observing in his own joint family that the women had been the main cause and they created such circumstances in the house that the house broke into pieces and now all the brothers are living separately and they are not having visiting terms amongst each other. He was still unmarried when the family broke down and somehow he had come to London and has settled there as permanent resident. He informed me that he was working in a hospital as doctor and he has been allotted the department dealing with mad people. He informed me that he had been utilizing all the methods which were available in my research works and he had been successful in treating some mad people and now they are living a normal life.

This was all about his letters and one day I got a letter from his side in which he informed me that he was coming to India specially to meet me and he shall be getting some latest methods of correcting mad people. I was surprised to note the contents of his letter and it gave me further surprise when I noted that he shall be staying with me here in India because he would not like to stay with any of his brothers who are already having so many property disputes amongst themselves and were present in Courts facing and countering each other.

Since this fellow had been my booster throughout in the past, I could not give him a negative reply. I waited for him and even I went to Delhi to receive him at the airport. I was waiting for him with a banner in my hand and he straightway came to me and called me by my name and actually took me in his arms and pressed me hard and this continued for about five minutes, when he again took up his baggage and we both boarded the car in which I had been traveling to Delhi.

We had been having talks on different subjects. Since it was already ten of night, I suggested that we should stay in hotel and we actually stayed in a hotel and left for Patiala the next day.

I had a strange feeling because for the first time in my life a man had taken me in his arms and has pressed me hard with his body and this pressing continued for at least five minutes I was driving car and he was having his seat beside me. We had been talking on the subject of psychology and he was also having some talks about the administration in the University. I explained whatever I could keeping myself in limits prescribed by the conduct rules.

His name was Avtar Singh and he stayed with me for half a month. We had been to hill stations and we also visited Nanded- Hazoor Sahib. We both were not religious persons, but he wanted to visit this holy place because he told me that every Sikh must visit this holy place before he actually crosses 60 years of his age and we both were below this age. We also visited Nanak Jheera Gurdwarssahib which was in an other state in India. At places he had been holding my hand and on each morning he been meeting me in the same way which he did on the airport. I could get some new experiences in my life, but still this man had not proposed further relations which we shall be having in future life.

On the last night he suggested, “ Please come to London and stay with me. You can come there for having further research work in your subject. The universities there shall be welcoming your entry and the student public shall also have some benefits from you:. I just had a smile and no words came out of my mouth. This man was leaving me. He was inviting me to his own station and at the same time was not suggesting anything about our relations in the future. At the airport, he again took me in his arms and left India for ever. We never met again. I am still unmarried, but the man who had taken me in his arms and had pressed me hard gave me all what a married woman could get from a man. I had decided to live with these memories and was ready to spend remaining part of my life without marriage. But still I wish that Dr. Avtar Singh who was the first and the last man taking me in his arms should come and suggest that we should have marriage so that I could be in his arms time and again. He had been writing me letters and often called on phone too, but he never suggested that he is willing to have marriage with me. I am still waiting a letter or a phone from his side and I shall be the last woman to ignore his call.

——————————

 Mail this post

Technorati Tags: ,

Leave your Comment

Michael Joseph Jackson – Born from 29th Aug 1958 to 25th Jun 2009 – Love him or hate him, Michael Jackson or MJ as he was affectionately known was the indisputable King of Pop and was one of the greatest, if not the greatest singer, dancer and entertainer the world has ever known.

Born as Michael Joseph Jackson in Gary, Indiana, The world first got a glimpse of this superstar when MJ appeared on TV with his siblings, then known as The Jackson Five in 1968.

Although still a member of The Jackson five, he launched his solo career in 1971. His popularity as a great singer and dancer kept on spreading until in his 1982 album, Thriller became the world’s best selling album of all time.

Actually, the Thriller was only a precursor to 4 more of his chart busting albums – Off the Wall in 1979, Bad in 1987, Dangerous in 1991 and of course, HIStory in1995.

In the early 1980s, Michael went on to become the first African American entertainer to amass a legion of strong crossover fans following on MTV. The popularity of his music videos, such as Beat It, Billie Jean and Thriller transformed the music video from a promotional tool into a a truly professional art form.

In his heydays, Michael Jackson donated and raised millions of dollars for beneficial and charitable causes through his foundations.

A sad chapter of his life was when he was accused of child sexual abuse in 1993. However, the criminal charges against the singer were dropped due to lack of evidence. Then in 2005, MJ was tried and acquitted of further sexual abuse allegations and several other charges. His life was a miserable shamble then.

Michael Jackson was said to have a very unhappy childhood. Jackson recounted several times that he was physically and emotionally abused by his father from a very young age and was forced to do incessant rehearsals, had whippings and name calling. But he also credited his father’s strict discipline as playing a large part in his success as a top notched singer, performer and entertainer.

Michael Jackson first spoke openly about his childhood abuse in a 1993 interview with Oprah Winfrey. He said that during his childhood he often cried from loneliness and would sometimes start to throw up upon seeing his father.

In another high interview, the singer covered his face with his hand and began crying when talking about his childhood abuse. Jackson recalled that his father, Joseph Jackson sat on a chair with a belt in his hand as he and his siblings rehearsed and that “if you didn’t do it the right way, he would tear you up, really get at you”.

The entertainer’s biggest moment was during the period of Thriller when his lawyer John Branca negotiated what he proudly announced then as the highest royalty rate ever in the music industry, approximately $2 per album. Meanwhile, MJ raked in more profits from The Making of Michael Jackson’s Thriller, a documentary by himself and John Landis which sold over more than 300,000 copies at that time.

March 25, 1983, gave birth to the Moonwalk dance routine. He debuted this new dance form in live on the Motown 25’s Yesterday, Today, Forever television special, both with The Jackson 5 and on his own singing “Billie Jean”. His Moon Walk during the event were seen by more than 47 million viewers during its initial airing and drew comparisons to Elvis Presley’s and the The Beatles’ appearances on The Ed Sullivan Show.

MJ’s compassionate golden heart was seen when he co-wrote the charity single “We Are the World” with Lionel Richie, which was released worldwide to help the poor in Africa and the US. Jackson was also one of 39 music celebrities and singers who performed on the record. The single became one of the best-selling singles of all time, with 20 million copies sold and millions of dollars donated to famine relief.

Another celebrity Jackson worked closely with was Paul McCartney and together, the duo had two hit singles “The Girl Is Mine” and “Say Say Say”. But unfortunately, this partnership fell through after some business disagreements.

In 1986, the media ran a story claiming that Jackson slept in a hyperbaric oxygen chamber to slow down the aging process. However, the report was not true as it was later known that Michael had disseminated the fabricated story himself. He was promoting his upcoming film Captain EO and wanted to promote a science fiction image of himself.

In 1988, some two years after he was diagnosed with vitiligo, Jackson bought and befriended a pet chimpanzee called Bubbles, an act which extended his eccentric persona. In 2003, the singer claimed that Bubbles shared his toilet and cleaned his bedroom. Then it was reported that Jackson bought the bones of The Elephant Man.

Again these were stories that Jackson disseminated to the media. These incredible stories inspired the nickname “Wacko Jacko” although Michael would eventually despise the nickname. Realizing his mistake, he stopped leaking untruths to the press. However due to the profits raking in from these sensational stories, the media and the began making up their own stories.

Michael was born with medium-brown skin, but from early 1980s, his skin gradually grew paler. This change gained widespread media coverage, including rumors that Jackson was bleaching his skin.

Then in the mid 1980s, Jackson was diagnosed with vitiligo and lupus, the latter was in remission in Jackson’s case, and both illnesses made him sensitive to sunlight. The treatments he used for his condition further lightened his skin color and with the application of pancake makeup to even out blotches, he could appear very pale.

The structure of his face changed as well with many surgeons speculating that Jackson had undergone multiple nose surgeries, a forehead lift, thinned lips and a cheekbone surgeries. Some of his colleagues also reported that Jackson was often dizzy and speculated that he was suffering from anorexia nervosa.

In 1992, MJ founded the “Heal the World Foundation”. The charity organization brought underprivileged children to Jackson’s ranch, to go on theme park rides that Jackson had built on the property after he purchased it. The foundation also sent millions of dollars around the globe to help children threatened by war and disease. The Dangerous World Tour began on June 27, 1992, and finished on November 11, 1993.

The entertainer with the compassionate heart performed to 3.5 million people in 67 concerts. All profits from the concerts went to the “Heal the World Foundation”, raising millions of dollars in relief.

In a high-profile visit to several African countries, his first stop to Gabon was greeted with a reception of more than 100,000 people in “spiritual bedlam”, some of them carrying signs that read, “Welcome Home Michael”.

In the Ivory Coast, Michael was crowned “King Sani” by a tribal chief. He then thanked the dignitaries in French and English, signed official documents formalizing his kingship and sat on a golden throne while presiding over ceremonial dances.

One of MJ’s most acclaimed performances came during the halftime show at Super Bowl XXVII. As the performances began, Jackson was catapulted onto the stage as fireworks went off behind him. As he landed on the canvass, he maintained a motionless “clenched fist, standing statue stance”, dressed in a gold and black military outfit and sunglasses, he remained completely motionless for several minutes while the crowd cheered.

The entertainer then slowly removed his sunglasses, threw them away and began to sing and dance. His routine included four songs – Jam, Billie Jean, Black or White and Heal the World. It was the first Super Bowl where the audience figures increased during the half-time show, and was viewed by 135 million Americans alone.

In May 1994, Jackson married singer-songwriter Lisa Marie Presley, the daughter of the other “King”, Elvis Presley. They had first met in 1975 during one of Jackson’s family engagements at the MGM Grand Hotel and Casino, and were reconnected through a mutual friend in early 1993.

As child molestation accusations became public, Jackson became dependent on Lisa Marie for emotional support. She was concerned about his faltering health and addiction to drugs. Lisa Marie explained, “I believed he didn’t do anything wrong and that he was wrongly accused and yes I started falling for him. I wanted to save him. I felt that I could do it.”

Jackson finally proposed to Lisa over the phone towards the late part of 1993, “If I asked you to marry me, would you do it?” Lisa Marie Presley and Jackson were subsequently married in the Dominican Republic in secrecy. At the time, the tabloid media speculated that the wedding was a ploy to prop up Jackson’s public image in light of prior sexual abuse allegations.

Their marriage felled through when Jackson and Lisa divorced less than two years later. However, they remained as good friends.

Michael then kept a low profile in most of 1990s and pleasantly surprised the world with the released of Invincible in October 2001. To promote the new album, a special 30th Anniversary celebration at Madison Square Garden occurred in September 2001 to mark the Jackson’s 30th year as a solo artist.

Michael appeared onstage alongside his siblings for the first time since 1984. The mega celebration also featured performances by Mya, Usher, Whitney Houston, ‘N Sync, and Slash, alongside other celebrities.

In the wake of the 9/11 terrorist attacks, Michael helped organize the United We Stand: What More Can I Give benefit concert at RFK Stadium in Washington, D.C. The concert was aired on October 21st October 2001, and included performances from dozens of celebrity entertainers, including Michael himself who performed his song “What More Can I Give” as the finale.

Jackson’s third child, Prince Michael Jackson II (also known as Blanket) was born in 2002. The mother’s identity was never known because he said the child was the result of artificial insemination from a surrogate mother and his own sperm cells.

In November 2002, Jackson brought his newborn son onto the balcony of his hotel room in Berlin, as fans stood below. Holding him in his right arm, Jackson briefly extended the baby over the railing of the balcony, four stories above ground level, causing widespread panic and criticism in the media. Michael later regretted and apologized for the incident, calling it “a terrible mistake”.

Then in a 2003 Granada Television documentary “Living with Michael Jackson”, he was seen holding hands and discussing sleeping arrangements with a boy named Gavin Arvizo, who would later accuse him of child sexual abuse.

MJ denied the sexual abuse allegations vigorously, saying that the sleep overs were in no way sexual in nature. His good friend, celebrity Elizabeth Taylor defended him on Larry King Live, saying that she had been there when they were in the bed, watching television and reiterated that there was nothing wrong about watching TV together.

During the investigation, Jackson’s profile was examined by mental health professional Dr. Stan Katz. Dr. Katz spent several hours with the accuser too. The assessment made by Katz was that Jackson had become a regressed 10-year-old and did not fit the profile of a pedophile.

The trial came two years after Jackson was first charged. During this period, Michael became dependent on morphine and Demerol, a dependency which he subsequently overcame. He also suffered from stress-related illnesses and severe weight loss that would alter his appearance. The intensely watched trial lasted five months and MJ was finally acquitted in May 2005.

Michael was supposed to make a spectacular comeback and had been scheduled to perform 50 sold-out concerts to over a million people at 02 Arena in London from July 13 to March 6, 2010. During a publicity press conference, he had made suggestions of possible retirement after the concert series.

However, on June 25th 2009, Michael Jackson collapsed at his rented mansion at North Carolwood Drive in the Holmby Hills area of Los Angeles. Pending confirmation from toxicology reports, he was allegedly administered Demerol shortly before he stopped breathing. Attempts at resuscitating him by his personal doctors were unsuccessful.

The King Of Pop, Michael Jackson was pronounced dead at approximately 2:25 p.m. local time. Rumors and news of Jackson’s death broke internet web records triggering a cyberspace traffic jam giving Google, Twitter, Facebook and Yahoo their highest traffic on record.

Chris Chew owns a music education and a fitness website at Singing Lessons and Build Swimmer’s Physique

 Mail this post

Technorati Tags: , , ,

Leave your Comment

One week after top-ranked Woods announced an indefinite break from golf and admitted adultery, new reports kept a media firestorm swirling around the first billionaire athlete for a fourth week with no end in sight.

Elin Woods has hired 82-year-old Sorrell Trope, a noted divorce attorney who has represented such stars as Nicole Kidman, Hugh Grant, Nicolas Cage, Britany Spears and Cary Grant in a 60-year career, the New York Post said.

Trope’s reputation as a tough dealmaker could help the former Swedish model, who reportedly signed a pre-nuptual aggrement with Woods but might be in line for even greater riches given her humiliations of the past weeks.

At least 14 women have claimed — or been said to have had — affairs with Woods ( Jamie Jungers: I have Sex with Tiger ), who has commented only in statements on his websites and said nothing about the extent of his admitted infidelity.

The Wall Street Journal reported that the National Enquirer kept quiet about a Woods affair in 2007 in exchange for the 14-time major champion speaking with sister publication Men’s Fitness for a cover story.

Under terms of the deal, the Enquirer would not publish photographs and a story on Woods having an extra-marital affair and Woods agreed to a cover and photo spread in Men’s Fitness, the Journal reported, citing unnamed sources.

American Media Inc., which owns both publications, denied such a deal took place in a letter to the Journal while Woods agent Mark Steinberg had no comment to the newspaper.

It was two days after an Enquirer report on Woods’s affair with showclub hostess Rachel Uchitel that he struck a tree and hydrant in an early morning drive, purportedly one caused by a row between him and Elin.

It was Mindy Lawton, a Florida restaurant employee who has claimed a liaison with Woods, who was in the pictures not published by the Enquirer, the Journal reported.

Woods was photographed meeting Lawton in a church parking lot near the home he shared with Elin, according to the report, which added that the source told the newspaper the pictures were poorly lit and details were tough to make out.

But the mere threat of publication made by the Enquirer to representatives of Woods was enough for them to suggest the Men’s Fitness deal, the report said.

Woods at the time had a deal with Golf Digest for up to one million dollars in annual donations to his foundation in exchange for Woods limiting appearances in other magazines and writing a techniques column, it said.

The scrambling by Woods to buy silence from those who could expose details of his misdeeds is not yet over, according to celebrity website TMZ.

Woods is doing all that he can to save his marriage, including making calls behind-the-scenes to women with whom he had affairs about possible deals, it said. Prior reports had Woods paying Uchitel to remain silent.

Also Friday, Woods lost backing from his third major sponsor in a week when Swiss watchmaker Tag Heuer revealed it is dropping the golf star from U.S. advertising campaigns in the wake of his sex scandal.

In a move that follows consulting firm Accenture ending a six-year deal with Woods (Nike Golf Beleve in Tiger still), Tag Heuer chief executive Jean-Christophe Babin told Swiss newspaper Le Matin his firm will not use Woods images in U.S. ads for the foreseeable future.

Tag Heuer’s move mirrors that of razormaker Gillette, which last weekend announced it was dropping Woods from commercials during his hiatus, calling it a supportive move.

Woods found support in at least one controversy.

Concerns had been raised about Woods being aided in his recovery from knee surgery by Canadian doctor Anthony Galea, who faces Canadian charges involving a banned drug and is linked to performance-enhancing substances.

Galea did nothing in helping Woods to violate doping rules, the doctor’s lawyer said Friday in Toronto.

“He had no links to Tiger Woods (or) any other athletes,” attorney Brian Greenspan said.

And finally Friday, Woods was named the PGA Tour player of the year for the tenth time in 13 years.

The award is voted on by the players but the PGA declined to release the details of the vote which took place over the past four weeks.

Three Players Won GWAA Awards of 2009

 Mail this post

Technorati Tags: , , , ,

Leave your Comment